Day 45: Subtle Repose

I feel like I'm back at Day One.  So I had to go read Days One, Two, and Three to remember what I was feeling during that time and motivate myself to move forward.  It was pretty interesting to see how it all started off and what I got from that first few days was this.  "It's funny how in the beginning I started out feeling stressed and inadequate and ended up feeling encouraged and renewed."  I said that?  I guess that was me.  So I read on and looked at the final result of my first three days and something wonderful happened . . . I felt encouraged and renewed. 

So here I sit with a blank piece of wood, a pencil, 

 and an awake baby . . .

What's a tired mommy/starving artist to do? 

Hazrat Inayat Khan says, "The soul is a current that joins the physical body to the source.  The art of repose naturally makes it easier for the soul to experience freedom, inspiration, power, because it is then loosened from the grip of the physical body."

So I rocked the baby with my foot, picked up the pencil, and let my soul speak.  This is what came out.

I've been reading a lot of Frida Kahlo stuff so I was inspired to draw a self portrait.  I loved how she made herself her subject.  I have to laugh when I look at this drawing because I look a little annoyed, a little tired, a little frustrated, a little agitated, a little sad, and a little like a distant cousin instead of like myself, hah!  (I have a hard time making people look like themselves when I draw.  They usually look like family members of the actual person I'm drawing) 

I propped myself, or should I say my distant cousin, up against a wall and went to sleep at 3 am this morning.  When I woke up and looked at the drawing in a different light, it looks a little like, I might be having a moment of subtle repose.  So maybe my soul actual won this one.  Take that physical body!!!!!

 

Day 11: Daj'zha's Birthday

Today was 11/11/11.  We won't live to see that moment again, but my babygirl can say that she celebrated her birthday on this day!  Didn't have too much time to do art because we were too busy ice skating and celebrating.  I got to be eight again!

We had a blast.  I love experiencing life through her eyes.  She has such a great imagination.  For Halloween she was a spider fairy.  Something we pieced together.  Look at this face.  (Makeup by Mommy)

There is one drawing that I have in my sketchbook that I drew from a picture of me when I was eight years old, and my daughter is the spitting image of me.

My daughter is my greatest inspiration.  Seeing her everyday is really like experiencing Daj'zha Vu.

Day Four: Ahoy

In 2007 I finished the first draft of my soon to be published (fingers crossed and speaking it into existence) book.  Back then, the biggest project of my life was an extravagant book dummy that had to be finished before I graduated college.  I had three kids and was a full time student, trying to get that degree.  Life was in disarray, my load was heavy, and my knees were buckling.  I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I was just walking blindly by faith.  I drew this picture of my kids and dedicated the 1st draft of my book to my three babies, urging them to never give up and to believe in themselves.

I just ran across this picture yesterday and realized that since then my boat has gotten a lot bigger.  I have more kids to haul, the waters are rougher than they were back then, and what didn't kill me made me stronger.  I've got muscles like a mug from the many voyages that I have been on in this lifetime!  There are still no paddles, my hands are too full to hold any.

I'm just holding on for dear life to my crew, trying to keep us all safely inside the boat, as we ride the waves on this river of chaos!  God is my Captain.

The storm has been upgraded, so I had to upgrade my boat.  Ahoy matey! 

Thar she blows!  LOL!